How to Determine your Enneagram Type
Within Life After Kids we talk a lot about self-awareness and how helpful it is to identify who you are at a core level. One of the best tools that we have found to help you to do this is the Enneagram.
The Enneagram is an ancient method of identifying 9 different interconnected personality types. Using this guidance you can see more clearly your core motivations, core fears and your core longings. This is helpful because doing this work can help you decipher past behaviors and mistakes (oops!) but it can also help shine a light on your healthiest path of growth. As a number 1 Enneagram type, I appreciate taking all of the guesswork out (to get it right!) and relying on a tired and true method of calling out your potential blindspots ahead of time so you can plan accordingly as opposed to getting blindsided with them in real life.
Even though the Enneagram provides a ton of extremely helpful information, you have to do the work to identify your type and also to understand and self-reflect on what it is telling you as you apply it to your life. Even though there are many Enneagram testing options, there is no standardized testing for Enneagram and the tests that are out there are likely to be inaccurate and could very likely lead you astray. Another option for finding your Enneagram type is to read “The Road back to You” by Ian Morgan Crom for deeper understanding of each type. To help even more, here is a list of the 9 personality types, their names and some other useful information that can help put you on the right track to knowing your Enneagram:
Type 1- Nickname: The Perfectionist. Core Fear: being, bad, wrong or imperfect. Core Desire: being good, pure, perfect, having integrity and doing the right thing. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to make mistakes
Type 2- Nickname: The Helper. Core Fear: being unwanted, unloved, dispensible, replaceable. Core Desire: to be loved, wanted, appreciated, to be seen as selfless. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to have your own needs.
Type 3- Nickname: The Performer. Core Fear: failure, being exposed or seen as worthless. Core Desire: to achieve, to be respected, admirable or a role model. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to have your own feelings and identity.
Type 4- Nickname: The Romantic aka The Artist. Core Fear: being defective, boring or insignificant. Core Desire: to find themselves, to be special, to live as their authentic selves. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to be too functional or too happy
Type 5- Nickname: The Investigator. Core Fear: being incompetent, incapable or invaded. Core Desire: to be competent and capable and self-sufficient. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to be too uncomfortable in the world.
Type 6- Nickname: The Loyalist aka The Skeptic. Core Fear: fear itself, being on their own without support or guidance. Core Desire: to be safe and secure, to feel supported. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to trust yourself
Type 7- Nickname: The Optimist. Core Fear: being deprived, trapped in emotional pain, limited or bored. Core Desire: to be truly satisfied. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to depend on anyone for anything.
Type 8- Nickname: The Challenger. Core Fear: being controlled, being weak or manipulated. Core Desire: to be in control, strong and powerful so they can protect themselves. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to be vulnerable or trust anyone.
Type 9- Nickname: The Peacemaker. Core Fear: conflict, being overlooked, dismissed or unaccepted. Core Desire: to have inner peace and stability. Unconscious Childhood Message: It’s not okay to assert yourself.
Which type resonates the most with you?